Hollywood Wax Museum

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Before the “Professor Morlock” reboot made him a wealthy man, Jesse Merlin was obliged to take any Morlock-related public appearance he could get to pay his massive debt to the IRS and to the lawyers who handled his legal battles with the studio. One of these was the opening of the “Professor Morlock” display at the Hollywood Wax Museum. Merlin was so appalled at the statue that after he became a multi-millionaire, he bought the wax museum and had it burned to the ground. By then he had developed a Midas Touch to his finances and he wound up making a tidy profit selling the melted goo to a day spa that specialized in Brazilian waxes.

It was during his period of financial impoverishment that Merlin had his disastrous flirtation with the San Bernardino-based Church of Enlightenment and had to testify at the trial of the church’s leader Jason Fogelson (aka The Grand Exalted Yahweh Fukunaga). Based largely on Merlin’s testimony, Fogelson was convicted of charges of embezzling the church’s money and of having illegal sexual relations with thousands of stray dogs and cats. He was eventually deported back to his native Netherlands.